Those in favour of remaining in the EU have told WalesOnCraic that they’d like continuous referendums until they get the result they want.
The claims come as prominent Brexiteer James Dyson packs up his hoovers and fucks off to Singapore.
A spokesman for the We’d Rather Stay In The EU Thanks Think Tank Group Society told WalesOnCraic:
“We’ve got Rees-Mogg on a one-man mission to take us out of Europe and his bunch of cronies arguing that we Britain can stand alone because we won a war over 60 years ago. What they forget is that we won because of the help of 15 or 16 other countries. What we’re saying is that we’d like to have a second referendum and if we don’t get the result that we want, we’ll keep on having them until we do. It’s not fair that we should only rely on the result of one referendum.”
Critics of the critics say that they can’t remember what they voted for in the first place now.
“Bendy bananas and blue passports wasn’t it?”
Image: Athol Mullen
The current cold snap affecting the UK is set to last until we get some warm weather, according to experts.
Temperatures across Britain have plummeted to 0 degrees, prompting people to comment on how cold it is.
Head Meteorologist Brian McCloud told WalesOnCraic:
“This cold weather has come along and made us all feel very cold. Personally, I blame this Tory government who just keep on slashing away at things – in this case – the temperatures. I can only see this cold snap lasting until some warmer weather comes along. That’s just my opinion of course, not that it counts for much. I’m actually looking for a new job if you know of anything going. I’m good with my hands but can’t do anything that includes heights because I go all giddy and piss my pants.”
Tonight’s forecast – dark until morning when light will spread to most parts.
A cinema in South Wales has officially been charged with daylight robbery.
The latest victim of the cinema in Bridgend was a mum-of-four who was robbed of £180 after taking her kids to watch Aquaman.
Mum Geri Widethighs told WalesOnCraic:
“I wanted to take the kids to watch Aquaman because I wanted them to appreciate the wonderful acting skills of Jason Momoa. The way he moves his thunderous thighs and flicks that hair like he’s in some kind of Timotei advert – the kids need to appreciate this. What I wasn’t expecting was to be fleeced of £180. We only paid for the tickets and a bucket of popcorn. I’m glad I didn’t let the kids go for the Pic’N’Mix, otherwise I would have had to sell the car.”
Cinema manager Chris SquareEyes, who didn’t want to be named, told WalesOnCraic:
“We will be fighting this all the way through the courts. We are entitled to charge what we like for whatever we want. We aren’t subject to any laws and we have our own overheads to cover. So stick it where the sun don’t shine and I don’t mean North Wales.”