The patron saint of Wales had spoken from beyond the grave to tell well wishers not to make a fuss.
St David told a clairvoyant that he didn’t want a big fuss because he was no St Patrick.
He told WalesOnCraic:
“I’m not one for all this singing and dancing and drinking Guinness. St Patrick was hell of a boy but did fancy himself a bit. He was always wanting attention left, right and centre. He demanded parades in New York and all that kind of shit. Me? I’d rather just sit at home with a takeaway and a few bottles of wine. That’s why I don’t want people going out of their way to make a fuss of me on March 1st. Don’t go getting yourself expensive merchandise or shitloads of stout. Just have a nice easy day and chill out, you know what I mean?”
Fans of St David were quick to point out that he should be remembered in the same way as other saints.
One fan said:
“If I want to commemorate the man with a giant leek, I’ll jolly well do so. He did more for the church than that drunken Irish layabout who was born in Wales anyway. I’m going to get totally bladdered on St David’s Day because he de man.”