Fat passenger sues airline for sitting next to whinger

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A fat air passenger is suing an airline for seating him next to a whinger.

Freddy ‘Fatboy’ Eightbellies is suing the airline for distress caused from 12 hours of non-stop whingeing.

He told WalesOnCraic:

“As soon as I sat my fat arse down, the guy next to me started moaning that the windows were too small. I laughed but then he went on to moan about that it was too hot. I told him to take his fleece off but then he went on moaning about how he had nowhere to store it. I put my headphones on to drown out the noise of him but on he went, moaning about everything on the plane. Jesus, he went on. He moaned when I sneezed, he moaned when I farted, he moaned about everything he could think of. By the end of the flight, I wanted to punch him in the tits. By the end of the flight, I was a quivering mess. When I got home, the first thing I did was speak to my solicitor. I’m suing them all I can get, which is probably about £230.”

The airline, which couldn’t be named said:

“Tough shit mate. Shit happens. Get a grip.”