Kim Kardashian West ‘looking for a nice Welsh lad with a big willy’

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Pointless celebrity Kim Kardashian West is reportedly looking for a Welsh man with a big willy to replace her estranged husband Kanye West.

Kardashian filed for divorce earlier this today, but is already on the lookout for a new fella, according to Welsh celebrity columnist Giles Smallballs.

Smallballs told WalesOnCraic:

“The reports I’m getting from my contacts in Hollywood is that Kim is looking for a nice Welsh lad with a big willy. The reputation of the Welsh man as a legendary lover is known throughout the world. Many famous Hollywood actresses have demanded it, including Elizabeth Taylor, Drew Barrymore and that woman with the cockeye who used to be in Degrassi Junior High. Kim has felt very let down by Kanye, who often finds himself putting it around a bit, usually inside himself. My understanding is that Kim will be heading to Wales to find herself a new Celtic prince in the new year. I, for one, will be waiting to greet her off that plane, clapping my little hands together, and calling out her name in a very camp fashion.”

A spokesman for Ms Kardashian West said:

“He’s talking shit, mate.”