Drakeford announces that group sex can resume from Saturday

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Welsh First Minister Mark Drakeford has announced that group sex can resume again this weekend.

Wales is moving back to Alert Level Zero on Saturday, meaning that dirty dawgs who’ve been chomping at the bit can get it on with friends.

Horny saucepot Darren Dupper told WalesOnCraic:

“My balls have been bursting, mun. They’re like two big beach balls from Barry Island and I’ve been waiting for Mark to give the go-ahead for this kind of stuff for months on end. I’ll probably get up early on Saturday and head around to Debbie’s house. She’s always up for orgies before Saturday Kitchen comes on. I’ll also invite Karl with a K, Sheila and Sandra, to make it a proper group session.”

Welsh residents have had to make do with their partners during the lockdown. Those who live alone have had it worse, but some sex enthusiasts say that they are looking forward to getting their ends away.

“I’m looking forward to getting a good thundering,” said Layla Artichoke. “I’ll be in my element,” she added.