Boris promises price freeze on Space Raiders if elected

Prime Minister Boris Johnson has told the British public that he will freeze the price of Space Raider if elected next month.

Johnson was speaking at a brothel in East London when he made the manifesto pledge.

A spokesman for Downing Street told WalesOnCraic:

“We know that Space Raiders are an integral part of British life and with all the uncertainty around Brexit, we feel that we need to protect our heritage. Boris has therefore instructed us to put in place a freeze on the price of Space Raiders, which we will pass into law should he be elected in the General Election next month. We know that lives up and down the country depend on Space Raiders being 20p. We remember the outrage that was felt when prices went up to 25p and we are determined not to see that again. Not on our watch. Boris has also told us that this manifesto pledge may or may not be true, but that we are going to write it on the side of a big red bus.”

A factory worker who makes Space Raiders said:

“Couldn’t give a shit. I gets free ones anyway as part of my remuneration package.”

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