Jeremy Corbyn to ‘re-open Pot Noodle mines’

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Jeremy Corbyn has announced that he will reopen Wales’s Pot Noodle mine in Crumlin as he takes up his new position as head of the Labour Party.

The Pot Noddle mine, which was closed in 2006, will reopen as part of a new nationalisation programme for the country.

Former Pot Noodle mine boss Selwyn Idris, told WalesOnCraic:

“It’d be nice to see the boys again innit? It’s been nearly ten years now since the mine shut and for those last ten years, I’ve had to work in Greggs to make ends meet. The only problem I can see is that there is not much left down there in terms of noodles. After they closed the mine, me and a few of the boys snuck down there and we’ve been pilfering from it ever since. They’re going to have a bit of a shock when they get down there. Probably best lay low for a while. Oh – and this conversation never happened ok?”

Jeremy Corbyn was voted in as Official Leader of the Opposition on the weekend, just after Saturday Kitchen finished.