Sunday Driver Clocks 31mph in 30mph Zone

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A Sunday driver has been clocked doing 31mph on the A48 near Bridgend.

Police zapped the motorist has he made his way to an Easter Parade.

PC Jobsworth, who caught the speedster on his big lasery gun thing, told WalesOnCraic:

“This dickhead had obviously lost all sense of where he was or what he was doing. I normally sit here all day, zapping people with my gun, and not picking up anyone. This morning was a different matter though. It was just as well as I was here because he came blazing through at 31mph. This sort of crime must be stopped.”

The motorist, named locally and Stuart Greaseball, told WalesOnCraic:

“It was stupid of me. I had Easter eggs on the brain and I forgot where I was and what I was doing. I tried bribing the police officer who caught me, but fair play to the lad, he was professional to the end. I now need to pay to go on a Speed Awareness Course so I can be told not to drive at more than 30mph in a 30mph. I will need to demonstrate genuine remorse for my crime so I’m going to cry a lot.”