Hosepipe ban extended

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The ongoing hosepipe ban across Wales has been extended indefinitely by water authorities.

Bosses say that the half-hour of sunshine we had yesterday dried up all the reserves in the reservoirs.

A spokesman for the Water Board told WalesOnCraic:

“We’ve been carefully storing all the rain we’ve been having over the last few months and we got to a point yesterday where our reservoirs were close to being full. But then the sun made an appearance and it all vanished. We therefore have no choice but to extend the current hosepipe ban indefinitely until we get some more rain. We know that this will come as a great frustration to many people but we can’t go back to the 1970s. Not that I’m sure what happened then as I wasn’t born then but lots of older fuckers keep telling me about it.”

Gardener Brain Bellend expressed his disappointment:

“I’ve been wanting to water my daffodils for the past few weeks and this hosepipe ban is going to hit me hard.”

The weather is expected to be shit for the next few days.