A spillage of a shipment of 5,000 dildos sparked a scramble at a Welsh beach on the weekend.
A queue of Fiat 500s and Minis stretched back 5 miles from Cwmhard Beach after the cargo ship capsized and spilt its load.
One of the first to the beach was Mary Munter, who told WalesOnCraic:
“I had a phone call from my best friend who said that there’d been an incident down at the beach. She said that the ship had hit the beach and 5,000 dildos were up for grabs. I turned off my S Club 7 album and jumped straight into my Fiat 500.
“When I first got to the beach, I couldn’t believe my eyes. The whole beach was strewn with plastic cocks as far as I could see. I got my Kwik Save bags out of my boot and started collecting them. I must have collected well over a hundred; some of them haven’t even been used before! I’m now going to get them on Vinted to see if I can get something for my efforts.”
Traffic came to a standstill at the beach as sightseers collected the phallic fun sticks to take home.
“I got one for me, my Mam, and my Nan,” said another excited visitor. Local shops have been warned to stock up on batteries in the next few days.
