West Wales football team have lines stolen from pitch

A West Wales football team were shocked recently to discover the theft of the lines from their pitch.

The theft was discovered when Popty Ping FC turned up to train yesterday.

Club striker, Alan Wingnuts, explained to WalesOnCraic:

“We couldn’t believe our eyes. The lines had only recently been done, but when we turned up there was nothing left. They’ve even had it away with the centre and penalty spots!

“To be honest, some of the lads are still going to have trouble keeping the ball in play, even with no touchline. It’s the linesmen I pity the most though – they always gets their decisions questioned, even when we had lines!”

Popty’s coach, Sammy Squirrelflaps, said:

“It comes to something when even the lines on a football pitch aren’t safe. We believe that a rival club could have been responsible – coming down at night to roll up the lines under the cover of darkness.

“I have never known anything like this. A couple of years ago, we had a group of thick junkies trying to snort the halfway line through a ten pound note at half-time– but nothing on this scale – there’s just bare grass left!

“If anybody notices that a local football team suddenly has new lines on their pitch, I would urge them to inform the police, or even better, let the club know and we can send the boys round.”