Welsh police have been given emergency powers to beat the holy shit out of any fucktard caught trying to light a grass fire.
South Wales has seen over 800 grass fires, most of them started by mindless fucktards with nothing better to do.
PC Plod of South Wales Police told WalesOnCraic:
“I can’t wait to get my hands on one of these fucktards. They’ve clearly got sod all to do in their lives and once they see it on the telly, they go out and try it for themselves. Either way, they deserve a good kicking and me and my butties can’t wait to kick the shit out of them.”
The fire service has been stretched in attempting to put out the fires.
Fireman Sam Longhose said:
“I spoke to you a few days ago about this and I’m not speaking to you again. I’m booked in to do a Strip-o-Gram down the Legion later so stop bothering me mun.”