Police helicopters across Wales have been equipped with BB guns to shoot down any incoming North Korean missiles.
The Welsh Assembly said that the measures were necessary to protect the nation’s sheep and people.
A spokesman said:
“We don’t normally resort to these measures but the rhetoric that’s been ramped up by the two arseholes in both North Korea and the White House have driven us to it. Normally, we’d defuse a tricky situation by talking to people over the loudspeaker but we feel that this may not work if faced with an incoming North Korean cruise missile. We have therefore taken the unusual step of arming our police helicopters with BB guns. Our boys have been also been given BB pistol starter packs for further protection. We will not let any small Communist state threaten our lovely sheep or our people. The public can rest at night knowing that our boys are out there protecting us while we sleep.”
A spokesman for the White House said:
“Our Glorious Dear Leader today shot 15 holes-in-one at his favourite golf course. And there were 5 billion people at his inauguration. Period.”