Welsh ewe claims Donald Trump groped her futtocks

A female sheep from mid-Wales has added to former President Trump’s legal woes by suggesting that he grabbed her body parts without her permission.

Brenda the Sheep from world-famous Honey Farm, claimed that Mr Trump tickled her futtocks when he visited the farm in 1982.

She told WalesOnCraic:

“Back in the 1980s, Farmer Honey was in a bit of trouble with money and all that. We’d had a heavy snowfall and we couldn’t get out to graze but then we heard a very large buzzing sound and looked out to see that a helicopter had landed. It seemed that Mr Trump was looking to build a new golf course and our farm seemed the ideal place. He offered Farmer Honey £20 million there and then. Farmer Honey said he’d sleep on it and decided to show him around the barn where we were. It was then that he touched my futtocks. He just came straight over to me, touched me and then walked off. I heard him muttering under his breath that he could have any one of us there but I felt used.”

A spokesman for Mr Trump said:

“Futtocks? What are they? I’ve never even heard of them. Furthermore, Mr Trump has never been to Wales. Are you sure that you’re not just making this up? You are aren’t you? I can tell – the side of your mouth is curling up.”

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