Employment in Wales has dropped 2000% since last night after 3 million people took up armchair football coaching.
Each of the 3 million new armchair coaches say that they know how to beat Ireland on Monday.
A spokesman for the Welsh Football Association told WalesOnCraic:
“We’re always happy to have the public’s input into how we can beat other teams. We are inviting all 3 million of the country’s new armchair coaches to come and speak to the team ahead of Monday’s clash with Ireland. We hope that with all their combined views, we can find a way to beating the Irish.”
Employment minister Gladys Pipsqueak added:
“We are so pleased that these unemployment figures have dropped so dramatically. I was beginning to think that I’d lose my job. It’s good to see such an entrepreneurial spirit across the country and I do hope that these armchair coaches realise that they are self-employed and that we won’t be wiping their arse after them if they lose their jobs.”