Welsh builder puts in ‘no obligation quote’ for Trump’s Mexican wall

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A Welsh builder has submitted his ‘no obligation quote’ to build the proposed wall along the US border with Mexico for Donald Trump, if he’s elected President.

Sengenedd builder, George Lloyd Builders Ltd, submitted their quote last night. The quote is valid for 30 days.

Hywel Lloyd, the Managing Director is the great-great grandson of George Lloyd told WalesOnCraic:

“The company is celebrating its 100th year in business, hence the bargain quote of $40.5 billion or $4,000 for cash. We have a few lads that will be looking for work and if we can get this contract, it will ensure the company’s survival for another 10 years. We can offer it at this bargain price as we won’t need to import sand as the sand is all around you, on the US – Mexican border. It’s desert.”

Hywel also added that he can build an American/Canadian wall for half price if Trump gives him the contract:

“We are also pleased to exclusively reveal that we have approached the Canadian Embassy in London with an offer to build a wall on the US – Canada border for a special bargain price of $20 billion. If Trump becomes US President, I know the Canadians will be fearing an influx of US refugees fleeing the nutcase. The aim of this wall is to keep all US citizens IN the US. Why should Canada get swamped by Americans? Look at what the US has already done to Canada. They drive on the right and they imported Storage Wars to create Storage Wars Canada. The Canadian’s don’t deserve any more,” said Hywel.

A spokesman for Canadian PM, Justin Trudeau said:

“Canada can neither confirm or deny that it’s been offered a half price wall on the US – Canada border, but like anyone, we do love a bargain and I can confirm the Canadian Treasury Minister will consider it. Like the rest of the world, we are greatly concerned at the prospect of a looney in the White House.”

A spokesperson for Donald Trump said:

“$40.5 billion? Fuck that? It’s cheaper to let all the Mexicans in. After all, if you build a wall, they will buy boats and sail around it, or catch a plane to the US. I don’t think Donald has given this much thought.”

WalesOnCraic spoke to a Mexican who we will call ‘José’.

José said:

“Trump is a twat. What makes him think we want to live in the US? Look at it. They’re backward. He really wants the wall to keep the US people in as he’s afraid the Americans will see that our way of life is better than theirs.”

WalesonCraic can confirm that the wall, if built on the Mexican border, will take 10 years to build and will be 50 metres high and will look like a modern day version of the Great Wall of China, but will be built of breize blocks. The one on the Canadian border would be built first as the Canadians are desperate to keep the Yanks out.