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Wales celebrates St George’s Day by not giving a shit

Following on from the non-celebration of the Queen’s 90th birthday, the nation of Wales today celebrated St George’s Day by not giving a shit.

The day traditionally remembers the former Roman soldier from Palestine who now represents England. Welsh residents have celebrated by going about their normal business.

Tarquin Smythe-Peacock, who has been leading the celebrations, told WalesOnCraic:

“We wouldn’t expect you to celebrate our patron saint, in very much way that we couldn’t give a shiny shite about the Irishman, St David. We’ve been out and about doing some Morris Dancing and eating jellied eels and we’ll be celebrating tonight by drinking Pimms. We’ll do everything that you stereotypically think we do because it’s St George’s Day.”

English people all over the world have shown their patriotism by hoisting flags and putting up bunting in their windows. Welsh people have celebrated the event by going to Primark, eating chips and getting ready to go out on the lash down the club later.

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