UK start Brexit talks with request to hold Freddo prices

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The UK has started formal Brexit talks by insisting that there will be no price rise for Freddo bars.

The price of the chocolate frogs have been under threat since the UK voted to leave Europe.

Henry Smythe-Dullard who is leading the talks said:

“When we voted to leave the EU, one of the first things we said we’d protect is the price of Freddos. These chocolate bars are the very bedrock of our society and our youth, and we were determined that at no time should there be a price rise on the little blighters. I was moved after working in a corner shop for 7 months after I got sacked for touching one of my staff’s breasts. A school child came into the shop to buy his usual Freddo bar but what he didn’t know what that the price had gone up overnight. He only had 10p on him and having to watch him turn away and head out into the night without his Freddo bar broke my heart. I therefore devote these talks to that child. No child should be subject to a Freddo price rise again.”

European leaders said of the UK contingent:

“Bunch of arseholes.”