UK in the middle of a Grumpyfuckeritis epidemic

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Medical experts have warned that the UK is in the middle of a Grumpyfuckeritis epidemic.

GPs have been inundated with patients reporting grumpy tendencies and snappy remarks.

One GP told WalesOnCraic:

“The amount of grumpy fuckers I’ve seen come through my door over the last week has been unprecedented. One grumpy fucker after another has come into my room, telling me how grumpy they are and then telling me to go screw myself. Honestly, if I didn’t have a 13 bedroom mansion to pay for, I’d be working in Tesco.”

Grumpy fucker sufferer Dan Miser grumbled:

“What are you asking me questions for? Why don’t you just get out my face? I’m sick to death of people. Go away.”

Experts have said that the epidemic is likely to get worse before it gets better.