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Trump calls Kim Jong Un a ‘cockwomble’ within first minute of summit

US Supreme Leader Donald J Trump has called North Korea’s Kim Jong Un a ‘cockwomble’ at the highly-anticipated summit.

Reports say that Trump was reacting to Kim referring to him as a dotard.

A spokesman for the White House told WalesOnCraic:

“Can we get these reporters out of here please?… Right.. thank you. Who are you exactly? WalesOnCraic? Never heard of you. Do you publish real news? No? Ok. Good. You sound like our kind of people. Yes. Yes, it’s true that Donald called Kim a cockwomble. To be truthful, Donald isn’t exactly sure what a cockwomble is but he said that he quite likes the word and that it sounds quite abusive. No. Kim called him a dotard first…I don’t know. They were arguing about who was going to sit at the head of the table. No. I don’t know. Can we wrap this up now please? I’ve got girls waiting back at my room…I don’t know…maybe £100 an hour. They’re local. Yes. Got to go. Bye.”

Trump arrived in Singapore hoping to collect his first Nobel Peace Prize.

Organisers of the prize said that he can fuck right off.

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