Toddler joyriding fears in Penarth

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Police in Penarth are investigating a spate of angry joyriding toddlers that have left a trail of destruction in their path.

A number of bikes, tricycles, and kids toys have gone missing over the summer month. In the most recent incident, a Little Tykes Cozy Coupe car was stolen from Westbourne Road in Penarth on Friday 30th August, around mid-morning.

Local resident Davina Breasty was an eye witness:

“We first spotted the car driving very erratically on the pavement not far from Foxy’s Deli. It went straight through the junction at The Railway Pub before heading down Plymouth Road. Whoever was driving could barely see above the wheel, but to be fair they were pedalling fast. I could hear their little knees hitting the plastic steering wheel.”

The devastated owner, who didn’t wish to be named said:

“Gurgle, mamma dadda present gone, no wheels bad person,” before bursting into tears.

Local police officers found the vehicle approximately halfway down the tree-lined Plymouth Road in Penarth. Unfortunately, the vehicle had crashed into a tree and there was sadly no sign of the culprit.

An eye witness, local resident university lecturer Hans Offmebeer heard a crash.

“I heard a crash, and someone shouted ‘oh my friggin knee’, but they had gone by the time I left my house, leaving just the wrecked vehicle outside.”

Further down Plymouth Road, another local resident Joanne Remainer challenged a toddler hobbling with a bruised knee:

“I asked what he had done, but he replied with ‘None of your business. I wouldda burnt it out but I’m not allowed to play with matches’. It’s really not you expect in Penarth.” The toddler is described as 20” tall with red cheeks, blue dungarees, red bib n brace and a distinctive red hat.

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