This mother’s Dry January lasted just 17 hours

A mother from Newbridge has told of her feelings of failure after lasting just 17 hours into Dry January.

Ethel Slackflaps was hoping to stay sober until 1st February but instead got shit-faced on January 2nd.

Speaking on condition on anonymity, Ethel told WalesOnCraic:

“I started off well and by that, I mean that I didn’t drink during the first day of January. But come the second day, everything we getting too much so I got shit-faced. I thought I’d regret it but to be honest, it was nice to let my hair down and have a bit of a blowout. I’ve been shit-faced every night since. I blame my husband. He’s a bit of a boring shit. I just can’t stand sitting in front of the TV every night watching the same old crap. The only way that I can get through it is to get off m tits. The only thing that’s been dry this January has been my vag.”

Ethel was also hoping to try out Veganuary but that didn’t even get off the ground after she sank two Whoppers from Burger King.

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