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Police given new powers to taser next person to ask ‘All...

Police in Wales have been given emergency new powers to taser anyone who asks 'All ready for Christmas?' Thousands of people across Wales are expected...

Woman responds to builder’s wolf-whistle by offering him round her house...

A woman from Penarth has responded to a builder's wolf-whistle by offering him a no-strings-attached sex session. Debbie SlenderThighs was walking past a construction site...

Welsh nationalists demand separate weather from rest of UK

A Welsh nationalist group has called on the Assembly to devolve weather from the rest of the UK. Street defence force Wales First said that...

Alpine pop man reintroduced to parts of Wales for Christmas

The Alpine pop man has been reintroduced to parts of Wales in time for Christmas. Lorries will be out delivering bottles of Orangeade, Limeade, Lemonade,...

Woman files for divorce after hubbie leaves crumbs on kitchen worktop

A woman from Doncaster has filed for divorce after her husband left crumbs on their kitchen worktop for the second time in week. Lazy-arsed hubbie...

Samaritans call in extra staff to deal with last night’s Planet...

The Samaritans have called in extra staff after to deal with last night's Planet Earth II's turtle story. The programme showed baby turtles heading for...

Circling things in the Christmas Radio Times to be taught in...

The long-forgotten art of circling TV shows in the Christmas Radio Times is to be introduced to schools. The Welsh Assembly say that Christmas has...

Arriva Train passengers told to ‘lose weight’ to ease overcrowding

Passengers on beleaguered Arriva Trains services have been told to 'lose weight' to help ease the problem of overcrowding. Tina LargeCalves of the Welsh Rail...

Welsh builder says he can do Buckingham Palace for £200 cash

A builder from Caerphilly has announced that he can do Buckingham Palace for £200 cash. Dai the Paint provided the Queen with a free, no-obligation quote,...

Cardiff Council’s £30k Christmas tree finally arrives – and it looks...

Cardiff Council's new Christmas tree has finally arrived from China but critics are already likening its appearance to a giant butt plug. The Council decided...