Stannah stairlift opens on Snowdon

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The Mayor of Snowdonia has officially opened Snowdon’s first-ever stannah Stairlift.

The lift is designed to allow elderly climbers to ascend the highest mountain in Wales without having to do sod all.

Mayor Gubbings told WalesOnCraic:

“We take our tourism very seriously here in Snowdonia and after a meeting down the pub last year, we decided that it’s the old people we should be targeting. Most of them have paid off their mortgages and spend most of their pensions on their annoying grandkids. We thought we’d help relieve them of some of their cash by installing a stairlift on our mountain. We’re selling it as a thrill ride for pensioners although it only crawls up the mountain at 1mph. Our special introductory offer includes a free cup of tea and a bag of Werthers Originals.”

Pensioner Ethel Leathercrotch said:

“I can’t wait to go up the mountain. I’ve brought a blanket and a picnic as well as all my tablets and my inhaler. When I get to the top, I’ll come back down again.”

Pensioners will all be roped together once at the top of the mountain, their surgical stockings flapping in the breeze, for safety reasons.