Schools half-term ‘to last until 2022’

The Welsh government is expected to announce later today that the forthcoming school half-term will last until the year 2022.

Politicians say that the extended ‘circuit breaker’ will help contain the virus and have suggested that parents stock up on Netflix films and Jammie Dodgers for the next year or so.

One politician told WalesOnCraic:

“Boris has not been listening to us so we’re doing our own thing. We’ve therefore decided to extend the forthcoming half-term by over a year so that it takes us into 2022. By that time, we’ll all have been vaccinated and we can all go about our daily lives like we did back in the good old days. Until then, I suggest that parents stock up on films and biscuits to keep the kids entertained. I prefer a Jammie Dodger myself. I like the way that you think it’s just going to be another dry-as-arseholes biscuit but then you hit the jammy bit and oh boy – what a treat that is. Gooey and jammy and totally delicious!”

Schools traditionally close for one week in October so that the kids can have a week off. But ministers say that extending it by more than a year will give them time to have a few months off themselves.

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