Pisshead to restart Dry January again in 2020

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A man from Ogmore is to restart Dry January again in 2020.

Frank Fannyache’s attempt to not drink alcohol for a month failed miserably last night when he got shit-faced in front of the telly.

He told WalesOnCraic:

“It’s not for me. When I woke up on New Year’s Day, my mouth was dry as arseholes, my head was pounding and my phone was full of messages telling me that I was a drunken twat. I swore then that I wouldn’t drink again. I signed up for Dry January and was doing very well until last night when I caught up with my backlog of Coronation Streets. Carla was drinking a glass of wine and it looked so nice that I had to go and get the bottle that my Mam had given me for Christmas. The next thing I knew, I woke up this morning with my mouth was dry as arseholes, my head was pounding and my phone was full of messages telling me that I was a drunken twat. My Dry January had only lasted a few days. I’m going to try again next year as I’ve ruined it for this year.”

Frank’s wife Glenda said:

“He slept on the sofa because he snores like a bastard and soils himself after a few drinks. He’s not the man I married.”