People who let off fireworks are ‘fucking arseholes’ say parents and pet owners

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People who let off fireworks are ‘fucking arseholes’ according to parents and pet owners.

That’s the conclusive opinion of five parents and pet owners who took part in a recent survey.

Professor GoggleEyes, who led the survey told WalesOnCraic:

“I’m both a parent and a pet owner and every time some fucker lets off a firework, my kid starts crying and my dog pisses itself. I can’t understand why people would want to spend hundreds of pounds on something that last a few seconds. They’d have better value for money heading down to Bute Street and getting some woman to suck them off for ten quid. It’d last a bit longer and save them money in the long run.”

Firework fan Timmy Fucktard said:

“I love letting give loud ones off just around 11pm so I can fuck everyone off in one go. It’s the only attention I get as my parents never showed me any love as a child.”