Nostalgic Brits call for reintroduction of white dog shit to UK streets

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Nostalgic Brits are calling on the Government to reintroduce white dog shit to the UK’s streets.

The group says that the white shit reminds them of heady summer days in the 1980s, and have called for it to be reintroduced.

Andy Dullard, who heads up the group, told WalesOnCraic:

“Things were so much better when I was a kid. There were no viruses, all the shops were open, and of course, we had white dog shit. Seeing it was always a pleasure and as kids, we used to go looking for some, just so that we could kick it and see it explode. Those were the days. These days, dog shit is just not the same. It’s always meaty and you just can’t go kicking that kind of stuff. It kinda sticks to your apps and no one wants that do they? We’re calling on this Government to bring back white dog shit so that kids can experience the wonder of it like we did when we were little. We’re getting our blue passports back and now we need white dog shit.”

A Government spokesman said:

“We can confirm that we have received a request to bring back white dog shit and we’ll be dealing with it at our next Cobra meeting.”