An elite group of Lynx snipers have taken up positions overlooking Borth Wild Animal Kingdom.
The Lynx are preparing for a full-scale assault on the zoo where two of their mates have recently lost their lives.
Capt. Rocco ‘Pussy Galore’ Lynx told WalesOnCraic:
“We were first put on alert after hearing about Lilleth. Our boys packed up their kit and took up positions outside the Wild Animal Kingdom within half an hour. We’ve also heard that there has now been a second fatality at the zoo. I’ve ordered my boys to hold their fire for now as we don’t want to go taking out any more of our boys. But should there be another killing, our boys will go in and clear the premises of terrorists. Our lads are brave, ready – and armed to the furry tits.”
A spokesman for Borth Wild Animal Kingdom said:
“Got no idea what’s going on mate. One minute I’m cleaning the shitters, the next I’m being asked to care for a Lynx. He was wanting to go out, presumably for a piss so I just let him out. An hour later, I’m on the news. What a laugh eh?”