Lib Dems to make sorting houmous shortage their flagship election promise

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The Liberal Democrats have waded into the Great Houmous Shortage of 2017 by announcing that they will sort it should they get in power.

They have said that they would restore houmous to all supermarkets on their very first day of office – should they win the election.

Spokesman Darren Orange said:

“We understand the needs of the British middle classes. Houmous is the very cornerstone of many lives here in the UK and they are still getting back on their feet after the Great Spinach shortage of 2017. What the hell are people supposed to eat for their lunches if they can’t get houmous? We here at the Liberal Democrats promise to restore houmous to every supermarket shelf on the very first day that we take power. But we need people’s help. We can’t do this on our own. You have to go out and vote for us. If you want houmous, you want a Liberal Democrat government.”

Shopper Elsie ThunderGunt said:

“I love houmous but I’m never quite sure whether I should buy it as I’m never too sure how it’s spelt. I spell it ‘houmous’ by my girlfriend spells it ‘hummus’ and we’re always fighting over who is right. I’m not voting for the Lib Dems mind. They can fuck right off.”