KFC on lockdown after all the chickens fly away

KFCs across the land have been shut since Sunday afternoon after all the chickens flew away.

Eyewitnesses said that the mass-migration was a sight to behold, as 50,000 chickens upped-straw and buggered off. Nobody is quite sure where they have flown to but many on Twitter have claimed that they’ve gone to a desert island off the coast of Anglesey.

Scientists have been brought in to try to understand the palaver.

Professor Terry Thistletwat said:

“Sometimes chickens just have a tit’s full of being turned into a Zinger Wrap.”

We spoke to one Swansea resident who said:

“I was sitting on my sofa watching reruns of Ready Steady Cook on Gold again when I got a call from my other half. She was on her way back from KFC empty-handed. Apparently, when she pulled up to the drive-through window, a KFC employee told her through tears that they had no chicken. He was able to offer her a Strawberry Krushem, but all we really wanted was a 14 piece Bargain Bucket each, extra fries, 2 large boxes of Popcorn chicken and a Diet Coke.”

When approached for comment a KFC spokesperson said:

“Yes. It is true. Kentucky Fried Chicken has no chicken. We’re hoping they fly back soon but if they don’t, we may have to expand our vegetarian menu. We’ve informed the Colonel.”

The Latest

To Top