Miscellaneous bollocks

Ice Bucket Challenge Shrank My Face: Claim

A Welsh schoolboy is coming to terms with a slightly smaller face that he used to have, after his Ice Bucket Challenge went horribly wrong.

Gary Pinkballs, from Merthyr Tydfil, found his face shrank by 70% following the crazy charity stunt which has taken the world by storm. He told WalesOnCraic:

“All my mates were doing it on Facebook and I thought I was missing out because no-one was nominating me so I nominated myself and set my camera up to do it. I put a bucket of water on my head but for some reason, my face shrank really small. I don’t think it looks too bad except when I laugh – then my face goes a small as a button.”

Doctors were baffled as to why Gary’s face would shrink but his local GP did offer his thoughts:

“Gary’s always been a bit of an arsehole and I think that he’s been such an arsehole lately, that his face has literally shrank into the size of an arsehole. The fact that he put some water on his head at the precise moment that his face went small as an arsehole was purely coincidental. If I was his father, I’d have disowned him by now.”

Gary now plans to travel the world showing off his miniature face.

“I think the Chinese people would like to see me. They like things like that, don’t they?” he said.

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