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Garden decking officially listed as world’s slipperiest material

A group of Welsh scientists has officially announced garden decking as the world’s slipperiest material.

The popular structures are renowned for their non-stick properties.

Professor Brian Bigballs told WalesOnCraic:

“We tested out some of the world’s slipperiest surfaces to which came out on top. We tested a non-stick frying pan with some friend eggs but that shit got stuck all over it. Then we tested some Teflon and that stuff was pretty slippery. But then we rolled out the big guns and got Dai to walk on his decking first thing on a frosty morning. As soon as he stepped on it, he slipped on his arse, broke two arms and cracked his skull open. We therefore declared garden decking as the world’s slipperiest material known to man.”

Decking is popular with middle-class families who like to provide their loved ones with an element of danger in the garden.

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