England ‘Will Boycott Next World Cup So They Can Avoid Being Sent Home Early Like They Did In 2014’

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England are using the latest FIFA scandal to boycott the next World Cup to avoid the embarrassment of not making the pool stages.

That’s the view of armchair coach Glyn WideArse, who has coached Wales to their best-ever world rankings over the last few months.

Glyn, who can coach any team in the world from the comfort of his own armchair, told WalesOnCraic:

“England went out at the pool stages last year and they’re worried that it might happen again. This latest scandal is their perfect excuse to get out of playing in the World Cup. They’re going to pretend that they are angry about Mr Blatter and his mates but really, they don’t want to be on a plane out of there before they’ve even used the hotel pool. That is my belief and if anyone wants to challenge me on it, they can come down my house and I’ll punch them in the face.”

England, who are ranked 14 in the world, seven above Wales, have been a permanent fixture at World Cups over the last few decades. It has left most people in a predicament of wondering whether to support a team that’s on their doorstep, or to cheer on the opposition whoever they are.

Widearse hopes to see England at the World Cup so that he can cheer on all the other teams that they play.