Ed Sheeran fucks off most of Cardiff

Ginger superstar Ed Sheeran has managed to fuck off most of Cardiff during last night’s Principality gig.

Drivers were left cursing the four-eyed fanny magnet as traffic came to a standstill.

One driver told WalesOnCraic:

“I only popped into town to pick up a pint of milk. It took me 4 hours to get out of the car park. And all because Ed decided that he wanted to come and sing here. Why couldn’t he have just released a new album or something? He comes here and tells everyone that he loves Wales and they all love him even more. The guy says the same sort of thing when he’s in Scotland. He’s just a slut. I didn’t get home until 3am and by that point, I was well past having the Cornflakes I’d wanted.”

One Ed Sheeran fan said it was worth the wait:

“We love Edward. His songs are so great that we just loves him.”

Ed is likely to fuck off the people of Cardiff again and again and again as he’s here for 3 more nights.

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