Welsh scientists have announced that solar panels across the world are draining the sun of its energy.
Solar panels in the UK alone are absorbing so much of the sun’s energy that it is likely to collapse in on itself by January, thus ending the world as we know it.
Professor Brian CleverClogs told WalesOnCraic:
“We all think we’re doing our best by using these bloody things but the truth is that they’re draining the sun of its natural resources. Have you noticed how cold it’s got lately? That’s because the sun is losing its heat and that’s all down to us using these solar panels. Come January, the sun will be so weak that it’s likely to implode and the earth as we know it will end. We’ll have Andrew Lincoln walking around shooting dead things and forgetting that he was once in This Life. I suggest that we all go back to using fossil fuel and burning up as much of that shit as possible.”
Critics of Professor CleverClogs said:
“The man’s talking bollocks. The sun’s got a few years worth of energy left in it so I say that we use as much of it as we can – not that we get much sun here in Wales,” said one such critic.