Celebrity Big Brother announce first entirely celebrity-free series

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Celebrity Big Brother have shocked TV viewers by announcing a 2017 lineup that’s completely free of any celebrities.

The show, which is popular with dullards and thickos is back for a new series of inane drivel.

Producer Frankie Pleb told WalesOnCraic:

“We thought we’d do something a little different this year so we’ve taken out all the celebrities and put in a load of people who think that they’re important and famous. We’ve sent in lots of booze and we’re hoping that they all get it on so that we can sell our stories to the Daily Star and the Metro. We know that billions of people across the world are on the edge of their seats waiting to find out what goes on the house.”

Fan Wendy ShitThick said:

“I loves sitting around my house, eating pizza and watching other people talking to each other. I find the whole thing fascinating.”