Wheelie bins across Wales have been placed on lockdown after weather forecasters predicted overnight gales and snow.
Forecasters say that winds will be strong enough to blow empty wheelie bins over, causing carnage across the country.
Derek the Weathersheep, Wales’s premier forecaster told WalesOnCraic:
“There’s a shitload of wind and rain and snow on its way to Wales overnight tonight. We have issued a Wheelie Bin warning to the entire nation as a warm front moves into Wales, bringing with it all kinds of rubbish. This happened a few weeks ago and we had wheelie bins all over the place. One woman found hers in a nearby village and one man found his on his roof. We would urge everyone with a wheelie bin to secure them now before it’s too late. We will not be held responsible for wheelie bins that have moved from their usual resting place. We urge people to take action now.”
One resident said:
“I had a horrid time the last time it was windy. I forgot to secure my wheelie bin and it fell over in the night. I had such a fright. I was lying in bed for hours wondering whether to pick it up or not. I knew that if I did, it’d only blow over again. In the end, I lay in bed and listened to some Barry Manilow. I was hanging the next day.”
Forecasters say that the temperature will also rise slightly overnight before dropping back down to bollock-bustingly cold temperatures afterwards.
